Friday, August 5, 2011

Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead

I was one of the lucky ones. Those girls you hate in high school because they have perfect skin and long thick hair. When I was about 18 I started loosing my hair due to an autoimmune disease. It literally fell out in handfuls and it still does at times. It's why I cut my hair short. I hoped that no one would notice just how thin my hair had become. I'm told that no matter how they adjust my medication hair loss is a part of having an autoimmune disease and once it starts it can't be stopped.

I got a zit on my chin at the end of March. I had never gotten a zit on my chin before March 2011. That's how I found out that I was pregnant. I woke up, saw the zit and knew that that was the only explanation. Now I have a fine sprinkling of little zits across the bottom of my face and hair line. Goodbye clear skin. Hopefully you'll come back someday.

What I've learned from this is not to put my faith in my looks because they could be gone tomorrow. Find a man who loves you regardless because if you don't he'll be gone when your hair starts falling out, the zits appear, and you start putting on the "I'm comfortable with you weight."

I was 100% comfortable in my skin before I met Brady, even though I was 80 lbs overweight with more stretch marks than a pregnant woman. I started packing on the weight around 16 and wasn't diagnosed with hypothyroid disease until I had gained 80 lbs (3 years later). Even though I was fat I hadn't lost a shred of confidence because my faith wasn't in my looks.

Brady met me, fell in love with me, proposed to me, married me and knocked me up all within the span of a year and a half and my weight fluctuated. Some weeks I was up others I was down. By the time I met him I had been on my meds for a year and the docs had finally found the right dosage to make it so that I could start loosing weight again. When you're dating though you don't want to diet! You want to go out to dinner and eat pasta and bread! I didn't worry about my weight so much until he proposed. My weight was down then. I decided I wanted to get back in shape for the wedding but since we got married a month later I didn't have much time. I lost about 10 lbs after we got married and before I got pregnant. For obvious reason I am not trying to loose weight now.

After watching a documentary called, "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead," about a man who had an autoimmune disease Brady and I decided we wanted to try the juice fast. The diet consists of juicing large amounts of fruits, veggies, nuts, and beans. We are so excited to start though we are going to take it slow until I deliver and then we'll kick it up a notch and really start working at getting the weight off.

Through everything he is my cheerleader. Fat or skinny he loves me just the same... he does encourage me to get healthy though (I'm a sucker for french fries and salty foods). Who isn't? I want to be a healthy Mom. I do not want to go into my next pregnancy 80 lbs overweight. It's too grueling on my frame. I want to encourage our kids to be healthy and to stay away from processed foods. It's going to be a long journey but I think we're up for the challenge.


  1. I love this Brittany! I love that despite everything you still have your confidence. I too have an autoimmune disease, so I get the hair thing (extensions were my solution). I also get these rashes when my body attacks my skin, so I get really self conscious about even wearing t-shirts sometimes. Its hard to remember that none of that matters, but I'm glad that you have someone to remind you everyday! :D


  2. Thanks Lene! :) The documentary that I mentioned above was about a man who had the same autoimmune disease as you! He went on a juice fast and by the end of it his body had healed itself of the affliction and he was able to go off his meds entirely. "Fat, sick, and Nearly Dead" It's on Netflix! Check it out. :)